Dividing the Dime Personal Finance Blog

My budget has been wacky.

Culprit number 1 is the house. We've replaced a refrigerator, a washing machine, repaired the furnace ($390) and we continued a pest control contract (which I'd planned on ending). I neglected to include that quarterly contract cost of $120 in the budget so all that has been throwing me off.

Culprit number 2 is the kid. How big is that child's stomach?? (Pest control doesn't cover him.)

Culprit number 3 is the dental work. I believe I'm in the wrong profession -- how rich would I be if I were a dentist! My dentist currently holds about 20% of my humble current wealth account balance (total dental expenses this year about $3,000 for services rendered. Last year about the same). I feel like I need to marry him. He's not that cute, but I'd be $6,000 richer...

Anyhoo...
This is not to say I'm not grateful for having the money to take care of all these things, because I'm definitely grateful. There was a time when it was a lot harder than this...

But I'm pressing toward doing better and better every year. That's my focus.

I really need to look at my house-care account. I have a separate savings account for household appliances, household repairs and furniture. I stopped the deposits once the balance got up to $1000, thinking that we'd buy a new kitchen table and chairs and get our shower fixed. Needless to say the old kitchen table is still rocking (literally). And the shower still has a 'flow' problem. Within the past few months we've used over $900 on the appliances and repairs mentioned above and now have only $100 in this extra account. Again I'm grateful, but I definitely need to re-focus.

My freedom account has taken a few hits, too, most of which were planned for and expected (but not all), and we still have some leeway. But I'm going to have it take a couple of aspirins and call me in the morning with a new plan.

To add to all that: My brother is currently having his roof replaced on his house and it's costing him about $8,000! Yikes. I admire him that he's able to pay cash. We're almost in the market for a new roof ourselves and I definitely don't want to go in debt for it or use my hard-earned wealth account. So I need a more aggressive plan. You see, this is how it starts...my focus in every direction...

Added:
$135 in paycheck allotments

$180 as my automatic transfer on Oct 20.

$250 transfer from excess from Oct budget

$15.28 interest/dividend deposited

Wealth acct/Money mkt balance, $12,530

Balance toward extra mortgage payment Oct 30, $820

Total in account October 30, $13,350

Just checking in...

I notice that when I'm feeling the need to get motivated or inspired I head to Savingadvice or I flip through a few familiar books that I have. The computer at home is up and running (another wipe and fix, this time by brother-in-law), but it is faster to do internet at the library (dial-up at home is cheap but slow.)

So here I am and already I feel more energized. I usually just run through the recent posts of everyone, like Ima Saver, Tightwad Kitty, BA, mjrube94, Lux Living Frugalis, Whitestripe, Gamecock, etc. There are so many and I love to read practically all of the recent posts. It helps me stay on track.

I'm still striving for ways to simplify my life, but am overwhelmed by my lack of energy. And lack of enthusiasm. I am now inspired to create a daily to-do list of just 5 things. What a wonderful idea. Sure beats the 375 things I've been lugging around in my head like a concrete block. Of course, I have to put it into practice, which is the first thing to put on the to-do list every day, i.e., make daily list of 5. (ha ha)

I won't keep track of it here, because I don't get on the site everyday, but I do have a notebook/planner that I can use. I'm also reading another book on how to get organized. (Can't remember the title exactly: From Chaos to Order, I think).

Anyway, on the financial side of things, I did finally order my will kit, but now need to fill it out and get witnesses (heavy sigh). I increased my 401K contributions by a percentage. I researched dental plans. (They're EXPENSIVE!!) I withdrew $500 for our Christmas shopping (spouse and I, $250 each)--we decided that the full $1,000 wouldn't need to be used for Christmas gifts and have no requests for anything big. My checkbook is balanced to the penny. The church's checkbook is balanced to the penny. It's almost time to tweak the budget for 2010.

Keep blogging everyone! I can pretend that it's ALL done to inspire little ol' me!!

I tallied up the grocery receipts (all stacked up in a shoebox since my last calculation in May.)

2009 Planned spending for Groceries and
Household Supplies/Toiletries: $3,600

Spending through Sep 30, 2009: $3,119.62

Yikes. Looks like we're going to be over budget by the end of the year. Averaging $345 per month so far. (The plan was to average out at $300 a month.)

Bummer!

My estimate for planned spending was either a little low considering the kid is at home and not away at college or I got WAY too excited in the grocery aisles when I thought everything was ok.

We have a rotating dinner menu (6 weeks of meal ideas taped inside our cabinet door), but I notice I tend to over-buy breakfast, lunch and snack items for all three of us to get through the week. Something to work on.

I'll still challenge myself to see how LITTLE I can go over-budget by the end of the year. I can't give up trying.

Added:
$130 in paycheck allotments

$180 as my automatic transfer on Sep 20.

$200 deposit from excess from Sep budget

$15.02 interest/dividend deposited

Wealth acct/Money mkt balance, $11,950

Balance toward extra mortgage payment Sep 30, $820

Total in account September 30, $12,770

Note: I just read over my blog entry at the beginning of the year regarding my $20 challenge, and how I planned to add to this account. I can't remember having any 'no-drive' days to speak of. (I said I would add $2 for each no-drive day.) That's crazy. The good thing is, I've "supersized" my $20 challenge in other ways and have made good progress. I have 3 months, however, to save $3,000 to meet the goal I set. Hmmmm.... It looks like it will take 5 months to do that...

I was fascinated by an article I read, about a family that tried a no-shopping experiment for a year, buying only necessary depletable items like food and household items and some toiletries. The whole family was on board to do this.

I didn't get too many details, but I think I do this already, just not to the extreme that they did it. Plus, my family would not be on board at ALL!

Already, I don't go out to eat often. I've been out 4 times this month due to farewells at work and birthday celebrations for close friends. An unusual month--I usually don't go out for months at a time.

I don't have a cell phone, I don't have any fancy electronic equipment at home, I don't buy DVDs or CDs, I don't do any recreational shopping at the mall or at any superstore (it exhausts me), I don't wear a lot of makeup or perfume, I do my own hair, I don't have a computer right now that needs things, so I'm not spending much money on those sorts of things.

But are there other areas where I can test this experiment? I don't buy new clothes a lot like several of my friends, but I do shop at thrift stores for a wardrobe boost. Can I go a year without buying new OR used clothes?

Or can I skip going to the grocery store for a week and just use what's in the pantry?

Or can I do all my errands during the weekdays that I'm driving to and from work and not drive on Saturday at least 2 Saturdays a month? (No-drive days was part of my $20 challenge, but I don't think I've had any no-drive days this year.)

Can I do more baking and make my own snacks and bread?

Has anyone else tried this for a year?

I've been lazy and unmotivated about the budget and tracking lately.

It could be the time of year. Or the fact that I've had a lot of money go out (new refrigerator, dental work, the insurance was due, the kid's laptop was repaired). Or the fact that there are now 2 people at home who are not on the same financial page as I am (the kid and the spouse) and that appears to drain me, even though I'm trying not to let it. (I got accustomed to the kid being away at college.)

Also, without a computer at home I haven't been regularly reading Savingadvice to keep myself motivated. I'm reading a lot of entries today in an attempt to get inspired and motivated.

I also feel like groceries have gotten out of control, but haven't tracked the amounts I've spent in the past few weeks. I'm hoping it's just my imagination.

The kid has asked me to buy him a gym membership for Christmas (a year's contract). I'm considering it, but I hate contracts. And a year contract is expensive by my tastes. But the kid will be happy with this one gift (I think) and he can use it all year and I won't do any further Christmas shopping for him, which will simplify things for me. (Except I might still buy him socks and underwear... what's Christmas without new socks and underwear?!) We'll see...

My new pay with my new job has stabilized and I have about $35 each paycheck that I want to add to savings goals. I haven't done anything about that yet either, but I need to work on that (on payday!) so that amount doesn't get absorbed into other expenses. I was going to add it to retirement, but think I'll split it between retirement and my Freedom Account. (I sound like I have a million dollars coming to me...I'm always trying to divide a dime!)

Just feeling sluggish about all things financial, but still grateful to read everyone's blogs for inspiration. Maybe if I balance the checkbook tonight, I'll find some motivation and discipline...

Spoiled milk is gross!! We just replaced our most basic model increasingly luke-warm refrigerator with the most basic model we could find (freezer compartment on top)--no ice maker, no water, just a refrigerator. We found one for $399 plus delivery and removal costs, which we felt was a good deal. Actually, it was a great deal, since at home our refrigerated food (and milk) was spoiling and our ice cream was melting as we shopped.

But why did our refrigerator only last 11 years? My parents have a refrigerator that is 40 years old or nearly my age. It's old and worn (the refrigerator, not me), but it still works great. Their milk doesn't spoil. Their ice cream stays frozen. How is this possible?? I'm so jealous!! My household owned our 'old' refigerator for all of 11 years and it just conked out. And who likes shopping for refrigerators on their day off work??

It must be true...They just don't make some things like they used to...

Well, this has been an interesting summer.

Because the kid lost his scholarship, he waivered this fall semester about going back to the university he attended or remaining home with us and going to a community college to make up his credits and his GPA. (A decision made by him at the VERY last minute of registration. He failed every single class last semester.) Anyway, after a deep discussion of money, he's more mature about this then I expected he would be and despite my disappointment in all the wasted money, we are getting along pretty well. The bad news (besides the waste of money and the GPA) is that he's eating all my food and leaving all the lights on. The good news is community college is WAY more affordable then university.

Of course, his being home, means there's a transportation issue. His original plan for the summer was to work to earn some money to help purchase a replacement car for the car he totaled last September. He made some effort to look for employment, but not a grand effort as he was without transportation. Summer passed us by and no job.

He continued to think that I would purchase him another $3500 to $4500 car, that I would give in. We did go out to look at several used cars--I want a black one! he says or, Oooh, how about a Mitsubishi Gallant, he says, or How about an Acura Integra, he says. For a minute, I almost caved in, just like he thought I would. But Savingadvice friends, you'll be glad to know I didn't totally cave in.

He had $1000 in his savings account and I originally offered to add $1000 to whatever he saved from the 'summer employment'. (The $1000 in his account was there at the beginning of summer from previous income.) My spouse asked our mechanic if he knew of any used cars for sale and our mechanic happened to have a 1991 Honda 4 door hatchback Civic with a rebuilt engine for $1,400. We bought it. It's white and old and with a little rust, but I'm happy with it.

When it was in our driveway, we told the kid. He wasn't happy with it, because he's more concerned about appearance then anything, but I think he'll live. If he doesn't drive it, he can always walk. If he doesn't want to walk, he can try to catch a ride with someone or catch the bus if he can ever figure out our confusing bus routes. I feel fine about it all. I was finally making some progress in my finances and I just didn't FEEL like going backwards by $3500 or so. I realized I needed to take a stand for my finances because I'm the ONLY ONE WHO'S GOING TO TAKE A STAND. And I did it.

Thanks to all my savingadvice friends for your support!

Late again with the update but here goes...For August 2009...

Added:
$130 in paycheck allotments

$180 as my automatic transfer on Aug 20.

$29 leftover dollars and coins from allowance and grocery money

$8 refund check from doctor's office for overpayment of copay

$210 deposit from excess from Aug budget

$100 birthday gift deposited

$35 not spent ($15 not spent at restaurant because friend treated me, $15 not spent at restaurant because I previously won a $15 raffle doorprize gift card for that restaurant, $5 not spent for son's fast food when someone else treated him.)

$15.10 interest/dividend deposited

Wealth acct/Money mkt balance, $11,505

Savings toward extra mortgage payment Aug 30, $740

Total in account August 30, $12,245

I've spent my entire adult life trying to simplify things (my LIFE!) and free up time for creativity. I have a birthday coming up and I'm asking myself, how am I doing in my quest for simplicity? The answer is not so good.

Semi-Rant forthcoming...

Other then planned vacation time, my only regular day off is Saturdays. And I often end up running errands that day. What's happening to my dream of waking up and deciding what I want to do with my day? It seems to be getting further and further away from me...

I have achieved some success at simplifying the financial area of my life. I'm debt free, except the mortgage. I have bills that are easy to pay. I have (and I'm building) savings and retirement investments. I balance my checkbook regularly. I have a budget in place and tweak the budget when needed. (I love budget tweaking!) This is still a work in progress and my spouse and my son tend to add complexity rather than simplicity to the area (notice I said "I" and not "we" have a budget in place), but there is no longer an urgency or discomfort about the financial area of my life. (Thanks to all you savingadvice.com bloggers for your inspiration!)

Other areas, however, need intensive work. I find I'm constantly frustrated with how I spend my time or how my energy is drained from doing things I'm not that excited about but feel like I need to do. I've read many books on this quest for simplicity, on getting organized, on time management, on clearing clutter, and I'm disappointed that instead of having a simpler more joyful life, I seem to have a more complicated life than I ever imagined I'd have at this age.

It's not like I'm not trying. The areas I'm looking at now--if my life were a pie chart--are Work, Sprituality, Creativity and Family/Community. (I got this idea from Julia Morgensten's book Time Management From the Inside Out.)

Under the Work category, I put these things: home maintenance, car maintenance, my job, church work, finance record keeping.

Under Spirituality, I include self care, good friends/relationships, reading, studying, physical and spiritual health.

Under Creativity, I include writing, reading, creative projects and creative partners.

Under Family/Community I include church work (church work is in 2 categories), family time, spouse time, mentoring time.

(My financial life can be included in all these categories...work, spirituality, creativity and family. This is one area where I almost have it together.)

Each sub-category that's under each of the four categories has a long long(!) to-do list. For instance, if I were just to look at the home maintenance list...geez!!

But looking at my whole life, if I were to chart the 4 categories on an actual pie chart, WORK and FAMILY/COMMUNITY would be at least three fourths of the pie (WORK being the largest piece) and CREATIVITY and SPIRITUALITY a much smaller piece. CREATIVITY--my dream--would be the smallest piece.

HOW DID I GET HERE?!!? And how do I get more balance?

Anyhoo...
Rant's over. Now I have to try to do something about this. Happy Birthday to me...

For July 2009...

Added:
$195 in paycheck allotments

$180 as my automatic transfer on July 20.

$345 from overtime from June/July paychecks

$14.53 interest/dividend deposited

Wealth acct/Money mkt balance, $10,877.90

Savings toward extra mortgage payment July 30, $660

Total in account July 30, $11,537.90

At least they're new to me...

New position: I started my new job even though I'm in the same building and under the same local boss...I just happen to also have a supervisor that is in another state now. Interesting.

New money: I got a raise! And I feel happy that the tasks of my new job are similar to what I was already doing so I don't have to stress over the learning curve. The plan is to put more into my 401K.

New desk at work: Getting a new desk area (we're in cubicles) creates a need to purge and organize. I'm AMAZED (!) at all the stuff I've accumulated over the years of working at this job. I've been cleaning and organizing at home, too.

New dress: I found a dress at the thrift store for 7.99. It's one of those knit jersy wrap dresses that you can ball up and shake it out and wear it to work without ironing it. I LOVE IT!!

New attitude: The kid has been reading some of the books I've been checking out the library. One was a book on aptitudes and gifts. After reading it and taking the test, he decided to change his major from computer science (which it turned out he doesn't really like--he chose that major because it was business-like, practical and seemed to please other people--like me, my parents, his instructors, his friends). His new major will be English/Communication Arts (Media). I'm supportive and feel like he's making a good decision after reading his test results. This college thing has already been an intersting ride. I'll keep you posted.

New stock market level: Both my 401K/TSP and my IRA are increasing in value. At least a little... yay...

I wanted to compare current status with my "As of Dec 08--) status:

Mortgage: $56,741 remaining
No credit card debt still (yay!)
Retirement: 27,000 IRA (trad'l)
Retirement: 73,453 401K
Wealth acct (Money Mkt): $10,798
Freedom acct: $6,012
Cushion in checking acct: $1,050 (fluctuates a lot)
Christmas acct: $1,001
House repair acct: $921
Grandkids acct: $380
The Kid (future gift/out-on his own acct): $1,372 (he may use part of this to purchase a car)
Car account: $655

Getting later and later with the wealth account update, but here goes...

For June 2009...

Added:
$130 in paycheck allotments

$180 as my automatic transfer on June 20.

$730 from overtime from both May and June paychecks (!!)

$27 in leftover dollar bills and leftover budget change.

$8.63 interest/dividend deposited

Wealth acct/Money mkt balance, $10,218.37

Savings toward extra mortgage payment June 30, $580

Total in account June 30, $10,798.37

1. Still trying to figure out what to do to replace the home computer. The computer is dead. Dead.

2. Used a rental car to drive out of state to visit my parents. Great ride. I expected the cost to be around $350 to $400. It was $470. Not too bad, but it feels better to project/budget costs then it does to actually PAY costs.

3. The credit union where I have my CD sent a notice that they will no longer pay the 'tier' interest (an additional .01 or .02 depending on the daily balance). It's not a lot, but it was something.

4. The kid lost his scholarship (Spring 2009) due to his GPA falling below (way below) 2.50. Which meant we OWED the school $5,000 before we're able to register for Fall 2009. What!??? I cannot begin to TELL you how disappointed I am with the kid. We had a long LOOONG talk. He seems repentant and apologetic and willing to 'correct the error of his ways' next semester. But there's just one shot to do so (next semester) since money is a lot tighter without the scholarship. I want him to get through college with little or no debt and a decent transcript, but not if I'm the only one doing the work. Of course, I'm trying to avoid having the kid laying around playing Play Station all day, too, so I'd rather see him at college. But I can't do the work for him...he has to do the work. His success depends solely on him. (I must have said this to him about 20 times. It bears repeating.)

Other than all that, all is well.

(1)
I just heard today that my previous boss's brother won 88 million in the lotto. (He's not in the same state we live in.) Haven't verified, but am fantasizing and daydreaming about what that must be like. I don't even play the lotto--neither does my brother!--but that's got to be a head-spinner!!

(2)
We're planning to drive to visit my parents next week...an 8-hour drive...not too bad. Should be fun, but I feel nervous. Me, spouse and the kid. We're renting a vehicle because it seems practical, but I don't know.

(3)
Feel sluggish in this summer weather. Feeling lazy. And tired. Need a break from overtime. And I feel like I've been spending more money than necessary. We wasted $280 (using 'cushion' money) on trying to get our computer fixed. It died, faded to black, and I just wanted it to last through the summer, thinking that I'll feel more like looking for a new computer around September. (I have no plans nor any interest in looking for one now.) The 'fix' lasted for about 3 days and the computer died again! Bad gamble. Bad bad gamble!! I'm at the library's computer as we speak...or write...or whatever....

(4)
Lots of things on my to do list that I'm not to-doing. I appear to be very resistant to getting my will paperwork taken care of. This is high on the list, but not high in my motivation. What's the deal??? I also haven't been motivated to clean house or to write either, though I have lots to do in those areas. Just feeling sluggish. I've been to the doctor and I'm taking my vitamins. Maybe I'm just going through a 'season'.

(5)
Met a new coworker this week who I seem to have a lot in common with. It should be a lot of fun getting to know her.

(6)
Another thing to add to the 'to do' list. Car maintenance--tune-up, radiator flush, air filter changed out, rotate tires, etc. (Got the oil changed already. One down, 105 more items to go...)

2009 Planned spending for Groceries and
Household Supplies/Toiletries: $3,600

Spending through May 09: $1,675.84

Percentage spent: 46.55% of total Grocery/Household budget

(Confessions: (1) Trying to continue to use coupons, but I've been unorganized lately. (2) Still stockpiling sale items, but I'm worried that it's throwing my budget out of whack, that I might be overdoing it. (3) The kid is eating a lot over the summer. I'm buying more namebrand foods so the storebrands don't get wasted. (4) I'm trying to remain diligent about tracking my spending, though I think I might have missed/misplaced a couple of receipts--no more than $10 or $20, I hope!)

It has taken well over 2 years for me to get my Freedom Account to a level where it almost maintains itself. But I believe I'm there!! I looked at the balance and realize that it's been MONTHS since I've struggled with reconciling and worrying about the usual big outlays and little deposits in this account. I'm amazed.

The sub-accounts are still the same: miscellaneous (I call it a cushion), car insurance, car repairs, home warranty premium/home escrow, medical/dental, and travel. I've noticed this year that between that and the cushion I try to keep in my checking account, somehow, almost like an 'awakening' the current balances have created a lot of ease in paying the irregular and unexpected expenses. (A lot less stress.)

Current balances of subaccounts June 09- Cushion 1: $1500
Cushion 2: $400
Car Insurance: $1004
Car Maintenance: $465
Home Escrow/Warranty: $260
Medical/Dental: $1002
Replace Car: $650
Travel: $105
Total in account: $5,386

Major expenses are coming up but I'm prepared or still preparing. My regular paycheck deposit is still steady at $110 every pay period.

I've spent the better part of this year trying to convince my brother to begin a Freedom Account. (Started working on him on New Year's.) He has shown some interest in it, but not a lot. He says it's too much math and not worth the effort. Maybe it is. I like it, though. I guess everyone has their own method. He manages his money fairly well, so this isn't the magic key for everyone. I'm just glad I stuck this one out. It's been great for me.

A little late with the update, but only because I've been too busy.

May 2009 was not as exciting as April's challenge but I'm still plugging away and regaining my focus...

Added:
$115 in paycheck allotments

$180 my automatic transfer on May 20.


Wealth acct/Money mkt balance, $9,322.72

Savings toward extra mortgage payment May 30, $400

Total in account May 30, $9722.74 on May 20

May's total interest: $17.90 deposited

Other activity: I increased the balance in the Certificate of Deposit that I hold in this account from $3,054 to $5,000 even. (It's a 6-month CD: Renewal time falls in May and Nov.) Interest rate is low, but I'm trying every angle to increase deposits and keep things simple.

I'm grateful to have a job. I'm grateful to have a job. I'm grateful to have a job...

My focus has to be on gratitude because my job is re-organizing again (this makes our 6th major re-organization in 10 years) and I'm just a little weary of starting from ground zero every few years with these re-organizations within the same office. (There are over 300 employees...kind of a big "office".) But I'm grateful to have a job. I'm grateful to have a job. I'm GRATEFUL to have a job.

The other news in the re-organization is that I may be moved to a new department within the organization. It's not definite, but it's possible, and it's possible that it will come with a small pay raise. That's good news (especially when I look at my saving goals), but I'm nervous about it. No jobs are being cut, but there'll be a lot of moving around and a lot of workload shifting, which creates an incredible backlog of work in transition and more overtime. (I know, because we've done this many times before.) But let me say it again... I'm grateful for my job. I'm so incredibly grateful for my job. I'll keep you posted.

I've been working overtime at work a few hours a week for over a month and I feel tired but prosperous. Extra money has me smiling a lot.

I've been tweaking the budget. I like budget tweaking. The grocery budget is quite a bit higher with the kid at home, but I stockpiled cereals on sale (12 boxes at the moment) and frozen pizzas and sausage links on sale so that helped. Utility bills will also be higher, but because we were under the $200 a month budget for the last 6 months, we have a cushion in our account for the higher utility costs.

In the meantime, however, I'm feeling prosperous. I want to DO things, like go out to eat (we don't go out to eat often) or do other extra things I don't usually do. I haven't done anything rash, but this is what extra money does to me.

Then I start comparing my life to the "I'm Debt Free" stories on Dave Ramsey. Whenever I hear an "I'm Debt Free" shout and story on his show, I always wonder if I can do the same with my savings that these people have done with their debt. "Gazelle intensity" Dave Ramsey calls it, meaning extreme focus. I'm thinking, if people who have $21,000 in credit card debt can pay off the debt in one year or in 18 months or whatever their story is and they're making the same kind of salary I'm making (say $58,000 annual), why can't I SAVE that same amount that they paid toward their debt?

I think the problem in the past has been lack of goals and a wavering commitment (like the wavering I'm considering right now) to the few goals I had and not facing reality. (As in the reality that "something unexpected ALWAYS comes up and a financial cushion is needed for these things." I wasn't facing the truth of that until the past year or two.)

I started out great in 2009. I'll continue to blog about my $20 + challenge to my wealth account, how my focus is on that account and getting it up and past a certain level. I think I'm 'intent' on this goal and that I've done well thus far, but I feel myself wavering. And my spouse and son are not EVER on the same financial wavelength, so it would be easy for me to let things slide before I get back on the horse again. But I don't want to let things slide.

I'm tweaking the budget with my prosperous outlook and my new intentional intensity. I want to be able to save all my overtime money and every other stray dollar that comes my way. I'm mostly trying to convince myself to stay focused (FOCUS!). I think it's working. I'll keep you posted.

Wow.

The kid is still insistent that I buy him a car to replace the one he totaled. I'm still insistent that the answer to that is 'No'.

His original plan was to get a summer job and save money for a car by September. (He currently has $1,000, which used to be $1,800...not sure how he spent $800, because he certainly has nothing to show for it. That's another blog entry.) He has been lazy about seeking employment the past two weeks and is extremely reluctant to catch the bus to 'anywhere'.

We (me and his step-dad) offered to help with transportation if he got a summer job convenient for us (i.e., not too far from home). I also offered to contribute 'some' matching money to money that he saves.

Even though family and friends tell me to give in and help him out, 'just buy him a car!' they say, I'm comfortable with my stance. He's not in high school anymore so it's no longer a power struggle for me. (It was at one time!!) But there's no more punishment, no more grounding of a 20-year-old (not sure that it worked in high school!) I'm allowing HIS choices and HIS consequences to affect HIS life. I just have to stay strong here.

My choice is to help, but remain focused on my own goals. My choice is to help him, but not to carry him. I feel like I've figured it out, like something snapped in my mind when he was ranting about it...the battle is more on him then it is with me. I HAVE a car. I HAVE a job. I BOUGHT him a car that he didn't take care of. I'm doing the right thing.

Plan to tell him 'No' a lot when he asks me for money or to buy him a car. Also plan to tell him I love him a lot when he doesn't ask. The two are so closely connected for him.

He's a bright kid and fairly independent... until we get to the subject of money. Heavy sigh... All my fabulous frugality has fallen on deaf ears...

Wow. What a rant. I was really just checking in, since it's been a while. It's great to reconnect with everyone's blogs. I've been working extra hours so I haven't made much time to blog. Think good thoughts everyone! And those who are staying on budget and reaching savings goals--keep up the good work!

Getting a little concerned about upcoming expenses now that summer's almost here. The kid will be home for summer and hasn't been job hunting yet. I've stockpiled on groceries but am concerned about the increase in utility usage, arguments about the car, upcoming school costs. Also, we have major dental work coming up. Yikes. I'll keep thinking good thoughts... I've tried to prepare but feel like I might be a little short since I don't want to withdraw anything from the "challenge account"...

Anyway... April's Update...

My $20 PLUS challenge to my money market/wealth account included
(1) $48.25 deposit in 'leftover' five-dollar bills, one-dollar bills, quarters, and dimes, from budget envelopes over the two paychecks
(2) $40 not spent (one day the hotel parking attendant waved us out of the parking garage without requesting our payment and on another day a coworker brought me lunch. I also cancelled a doctor's appointment that wasn't needed until December)
(3) $50 transfer from tax refund (still stretching that tax refund)
(4) $100 gift from my parents after their visit
(5) $250 transfer from paycheck due to surplus in April's budget (partly from cancelling IRA auto withdrawal)
(6) My automatic transfer of $180 was deposited on Apr 20.
(7) A new paycheck allotment of $50 per paycheck was deposited (I changed my tax exemptions/withhold--I was paying too much in taxes through the year)
(8) April interest added was $9.39 (part of this account is a 6-month Certificate of Deposit) and $8.12. Total interest added $17.51

Wealth acct/Money mkt balance, $9,089.76

Savings toward extra mortgage payment Apr 27, $320

Total in account Apr 27, $9,409.76

Hope to keep this up and not get derailed by upcoming expenses. FOCUS!!

My parents were visiting during last week and my mother and I had some mother/daughter time by going shopping. I have a 'clothing' envelope that I'd been adding $30 a month to for the past several months and had a budget envelope of roughly $300 and some change. (I don't shop for clothes that often.)

My mother is a frugal queen. But she calls my father cheap. I intuitively know the difference, but couldn't explain it. It just makes me laugh. I have my money management skills from both of them. My brother is actually the only spendthrift in our family, but he, too, has saved and invested his income wisely.

Anyway, my mother and I had lunch (buy one get one free, of course), went shopping at one 'regular' department store (briefly), but the majority of our time was spent at a thrift store.

At the department store, I spent about $70 for one thing (I needed a new basic suit (jacket and pants) for work, that I can mix and match with my current wardrobe--this was an investment for me--and my mother bought nothing. One purchase at the department store.

At the thrift store, however, my mother spent about $39 and bought 2 skirts, a clothes hamper, a dress, a peach-colored skirt suit, a knit top, two work-pants for my dad, a straw totebag, a black purse, and 5 sewing patterns. I spent $70 dollars and bought 4 knit tops, 2 long sleeve blouses, 3 purses, 3 belts, two work-pants for my stepson, two tank tops for gym workouts, one pantsuit (which will mix and match with my department store pant suit) and one basic black skirt suit (which was the big ticket item on the "better clothing" rack, costing $19.) Needless to say, we had a much better time at the thrift store. What a bonding good time!!

My parents have gone back home, but there's a sale at the thrift store this week--50% of all clothing to celebrate Earth Week. I still have $160 left in the envelope, but think I'll only take $20... Maybe a few more 'new' shirts to go with my 'new' suits... Life is good...

The kid's birthday usually falls on Spring Break in March. This would be FABULOUS for families that like to travel and combine a "Happy Birthday". Welcome to Disneyworld or Jamaica or whatever... Not one time have we traveled ANYwhere for the kid's birthday.

I grew up a military brat (my father was in the service) and my first spouse was an Army man--I moved almost every two or three years for most of my life growing up. Since my divorce however, I opted to stay put and raise my son in one place.

The kid turned 20 his last birthday. A good friend of mine has a daughter who turned 13 and she took her daughter shopping AND to Disneyworld. I thought: Wow! I must not be a good mother. I have deprived the kid of traveling and REAL vacations. My son was OBVIOUSLY born to the wrong mother.

I asked him if he wished we had traveled more as a family when he was younger, but he didn't know the answer, since he didn't know anything other than staying at home.

Vacations are costly. We did go on a family cruise once to the Bahamas with my parents. That was a one-time deal. (That took me 18 months to pay for.) I never even had a budget for travel, except for visiting my parents. Travel was never on the list. But now I wonder if we should have done more traveling (like to national parks or the Grand Canyon or Disneyworld) when the kid was growing up. What do you all do with your families and children when it comes to travel?

We can still do some things...it's not like it's too late. I'm thinking about a cruise to Alaska. A road trip to the Grand Canyon. A trip to Europe? The kid probably isn't that interested in hanging out, but he'll likely go if I pay for it. Plus, that would be another goal for my sidebar...hmmmm.... Do I really need another goal??

Christmas account new balance Mar 25, $1004. (After regular savings allotment and income tax refund money.) Goooaaalll!

Money Market/wealth account:
My $20 challenge to my money market netted a $31.75 deposit in 'leftover' dollar bills, quarters, and a cancelled lunch date.

My automatic transfer of $180 was deposited on Mar 20.

March interest added was $8.45 (part of this account is a 6-month Certificate of Deposit) and $6.66, total interest added $15.11

I deposited $500 from my tax refund.

Wealth acct/Money mkt balance, $8,443.90

Savings toward extra mortgage payment Mar 25, $240

Total in account Mar 25, $8,683.90

The challenge is to get this account to $15,000 or better by Dec 15, 2009. Now that the Christmas account and checking account cushion are fully funded, maybe I'll get more focused (FOCUS!!) on automatic deposits, drive-by deposits, allotments, transfers, quarters, pennies, etc.

about home ownership and responsibility...

We got our carpets cleaned and our air ducts cleaned this week. Cleaner carpets make the house look nice. (The kid being AWAY at college makes the house look nice, too. He was home for spring break last week and oh my goodness! clothes everywhere, food wrappers and fast food bags everywhere, and we were constantly stepping over size 13 shoes in the middle of the floor!)

The cost of carpet cleaning combined with the vent cleaning was about $695, but we were prepared with cash in the checking account thanks to savings and our tax refund...carpet cleaning about $190 and vent cleaning about $505.

Now, if I'd just wash the windows and paint the trim work... the house will be really 'sparkly'. (heavy sigh... more things to add to the to-do list...)

I usually get this knot in my stomach when we're calling around for service companies or repair work for the house. Unless you're a skilled do-it-yourself-er, you never know if you can trust what a service person is telling you about your house. We were REALLY fortunate this time--this crew came in and did a great job. But in the past, we've felt like we've been ripped off by other home repair and maintenance crews, so we're cautious. It's such a task.

(Hardwood flooring crossed my mind, but that's another entry and a different dollar figure for a different day...)

The thing about home ownership is home responsiblity. The to-do list is long and the cost of things is ridiculous and you're dependent on a huge list of repair and maintenance people who know more than you know about your house until you take the time to learn what they know. Either way it's going to cost time and money.

Apartment living might create neighbor issues and a lack of equity and a lack of stability, but I'm remembering how apartment living simplified my to-do list and my budget enormously. I've talked with my friends and relatives about home ownership vs renting, and I seem to be the ONLY one who thinks apartment living has advantages. Is this some sort of snobbery on their part? Or am I just a whiner and complainer no matter where I am?...

We're here at our home and blessed and chugging along with our mile-long to-do list and our budget. I'll just pipe down and be quiet...besides, the carpet is looking really nice.

Is ridiculous.

And I keep adding things.

I need to file the finanical aid form for my son's college.
Go to the bank.
Make two doctor's appointments.
Order a will kit on-line.
Find someone to clean our carpets.
Rake leaves.
Catch up with record-keeping and filing for my church's finance records, 1st quarter. Hold a church finance meeting with the team.
Mail checks back to my health insurance company. (That they sent me by accident.)
Get an alignment on the car.
Check on my neighbor.
Call my mother.
Clean out my file cabinet.
Find a new place that recycles aluminum cans (the old place shut down).
Go to the dry cleaners.
Open a Roth IRA.
Bake pumpkin bread before the canned pumpkin I have expires.
Make a large batch of spaghetti sauce to freeze.
Send an email to an old friend.
Make bathroom more handicap accessible for spouse. (He fell this weekend on a tile floor while we were out. That pain combined with his cerebral palsy has created "access" issues in our home...)
Dust.
Get a birthday gift for the kid.
Buy an electric blanket.
Do my Spanish homework. (I signed up for an 8-week community education class to learn Spanish.)
Get to a writer's meeting on Saturday.
Have the hedges in the front yard cut down or removed.
Clean the garage.
Clean the attic.
Give myself a manicure and pedicure.
Find my black gym shorts.
Buy new towels and toss a few of the old ones we're using.
Defrost the freezer.
Fix the hole in the wall in the bathroom where the broken toilet paper holder used to be.
Invite my young friend to Sunday dinner.
Take donation bags to Good Will.
Weed out paperback books.
Finish one of the 6 books I'm currently reading.
Blog. (I can check this one off the list for this week. It's easier to blog, then to do the other to-do items.)
Take jar of pennies to bank for deposit.
Schedule card game night with friends.
Invite stepdaughter to lunch.
Update my beneficiary forms on everything.
Get the air conditioning unit serviced.
Repair the hem of one of my skirts.
Clean out my email inbox.
Update my resume.
Update personal papers for my brother.
Help brother with business plan for his business.
Balance checkbook.

I could go on, but I'm tired. Just checking in...

Christmas account new balance Feb 27, $669. (After regular savings allotment.)

I added $281 to my checking account cushion -- New balance Feb 27, $1001.

My $20 challenge to my money market netted a $15 deposit in 'leftover' dollar bills and $2 in quarters and dimes, plus $10 not spent when we tried to find a local playhouse to see a $10 play and got lost (oh well!). Total challenge deposit $27.
My automatic transfer of $180 was also deposited on Feb 21.
Withdrew $401 (money order fee was $1) to pay extra toward mortgage.

Wealth acct/Money mkt balance, $7,824.04

Savings toward extra mortgage payment Feb 27, $160

Total in account Feb 27, $7,984.04